imza shmo
10-17-2007, 04:05 PM
ive written a few lately.....in the past weeks.....i guess ill share. they are not my traditional style so im still teaching myself.
Time As Adversary
Emissary of atrophy,
Idle in your motion's drive,
Drain from me the hopes I have
To cripple wings that lift devotion.
Send the hours ever forth
To battle bleeding memories
That flee the broken construct
Crashing, crushing closer in.
I attribute not a will
To forces blindly seeking death
When purpose is the reason
Damned designs still stay their course.
Fear, as well, while not dismissed
Has absence of autonomy
So strength I need should then be found
In hearts' contrasting beats.
i had a short conversation about it with adam [shadowmancer on here] after i shared it with him...it might help people understand whats going on if they had trouble:
imza shmo: yeah....inspired by the matrix...
ShadowmancerLive: i wouldn't have guessed
ShadowmancerLive: the imagery strikes me as disjointed, but i'm guessing every line is consistent in your eyes
imza shmo: well, the central idea is that perseverence is a function of choice, and it would be dehumanizing to cease acting as i wish simply because of static factors that dont even have an entity.
imza shmo: theres really only two "images" in the poem so far as physicality is concerned. the heart doesnt really count because its not meant as a physical descriptor of plot.
imza shmo: the emissary of atropy is time, which is why it can be described as moving but not, and i felt inclined to write that because of how hard waiting is when i have no contact with cookies and all.
imza shmo: the two images then talk about what it does to the romantic feelings/construct. the second stanza begins by reaffirming fear rather than saying i am without it, but also groups fear with time as a mindless force that should have no real bearing on the most important decisions of my life. i finish by saying i should find strength in my ability to choose because theres no other way to overcome the still troublesome forces, and theres no other way to forge ones own destiny.
------
something simpler:
In The Deep--An Ode To The Sea
And when I'm old and weary,
I will sit upon the shore,
Soaking in the salty breeze
And remembering every year
My nets still came back in full.
You always had more to give,
And I will keep you company
Until my body, too, retires
So I can push off quietly
And join you forever in the deep.
------
theres a third i dont feel like putting in here for now....its even more colloquially styled and that bothers me oftentimes. yes, theyre all love poems, yes she posted here for a short time long ago, yes i named her cookies.
Time As Adversary
Emissary of atrophy,
Idle in your motion's drive,
Drain from me the hopes I have
To cripple wings that lift devotion.
Send the hours ever forth
To battle bleeding memories
That flee the broken construct
Crashing, crushing closer in.
I attribute not a will
To forces blindly seeking death
When purpose is the reason
Damned designs still stay their course.
Fear, as well, while not dismissed
Has absence of autonomy
So strength I need should then be found
In hearts' contrasting beats.
i had a short conversation about it with adam [shadowmancer on here] after i shared it with him...it might help people understand whats going on if they had trouble:
imza shmo: yeah....inspired by the matrix...
ShadowmancerLive: i wouldn't have guessed
ShadowmancerLive: the imagery strikes me as disjointed, but i'm guessing every line is consistent in your eyes
imza shmo: well, the central idea is that perseverence is a function of choice, and it would be dehumanizing to cease acting as i wish simply because of static factors that dont even have an entity.
imza shmo: theres really only two "images" in the poem so far as physicality is concerned. the heart doesnt really count because its not meant as a physical descriptor of plot.
imza shmo: the emissary of atropy is time, which is why it can be described as moving but not, and i felt inclined to write that because of how hard waiting is when i have no contact with cookies and all.
imza shmo: the two images then talk about what it does to the romantic feelings/construct. the second stanza begins by reaffirming fear rather than saying i am without it, but also groups fear with time as a mindless force that should have no real bearing on the most important decisions of my life. i finish by saying i should find strength in my ability to choose because theres no other way to overcome the still troublesome forces, and theres no other way to forge ones own destiny.
------
something simpler:
In The Deep--An Ode To The Sea
And when I'm old and weary,
I will sit upon the shore,
Soaking in the salty breeze
And remembering every year
My nets still came back in full.
You always had more to give,
And I will keep you company
Until my body, too, retires
So I can push off quietly
And join you forever in the deep.
------
theres a third i dont feel like putting in here for now....its even more colloquially styled and that bothers me oftentimes. yes, theyre all love poems, yes she posted here for a short time long ago, yes i named her cookies.